Mystery Blog #2
Prompt: Choose one passage from your novel. Revise it to make it more descriptive and visual.
Original Passage:
Young Elmer Robson, the American Millionaire, had actually built the place. Spent thousands on it, so it was said. Every mortal luxury…
Edited Version:
Young Elmer Robson, who rumor was built the place, had spent thousands on it. It was no big deal though for this American Millionaire. It was said he was the perfect catch, exuberantly handsome, rich as it gets, and the sweetest man you could ever meet. I mean who else would put every mortal luxury in such a place?
Advertisement
